Anonymiss in DC

{January 26, 2009}   Man v. Wild

The Discovery Channel is the ultimate channel for the little boys in men but I love it anyway.

Man v. Wild is oddly fascinating to me. Bear Grylls cracks me up. In addition to always being close to dying (and making sure we know that you could easily die in such situations), I’ve concluded that he can apparently make anything, anywhere.

Tonight’s episode, for instance, features him fashioning a little gate for his cave in Hell’s Canyon by– I kid you not– weaving together tree branches to make a frame and then weaving grasses through that to make the gate wind and watertight. If that weren’t enough, he goes on to makes himself a three-pronged hunting fork out of sharpened sticks, and a torch that miraculously doesn’t burn all the way down to his hand.

I know I’m not supposed to ask this, but why the hell didn’t he just pack a flashlight and a plastic tarp?

(Before you ask, yes, I am more of “an indoor girl”– even if I do enjoy the occasional good hike.)

Bear also makes me laugh because– and I realize this is awful and ethnocentric and childish, but he talks funny.

I say “algae” like “AL G.” He says “Al gee” (“Gee” as in “old geezer.”)

I say “vitamin” VITE a min. He says VIT a min.

I say “glacier” GLAY SHUR. He says “GLASSY-ER.”

Teehee. I am easily amused, obviously.

Plus, what’s not to enjoy about a man who will rip a leg bone out of a deer that’s been dead for a week and suck out the marrow for a little protein boost?

Mmmm. Yummy.

I guess at least he’s not a picky eater.

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